i’m 13, am i too young to have sex and is it illegal?
Q: I’m 13 and my boyfriend is 14. I love him with all my heart and I know I’m ready for sex. My friends all tell me I’m too young and that it’s against the law to have sex at my age. Is this true?
A: Kind of and that depends. In most states it is not a crime for underage teens to have sex with other underage teens, but in some places it is actually illegal for minor to have sex, even if they both consent and even if they are the same age.
As to the question of whether or not you are too young, that is a tougher one. A lot of people, including your friends, think that 13 is just too young to have sex, and many teens find that it is better to wait to have sex until they are older and will have more information and be in a better position to get help if they run into problems.
Love is great, but when it comes to sex, it isn’t the only important thing to think about. Here are some others:
- Do you think you might feel different about your boyfriend after having sex? How do you think sex will affect your relationship? What if it changes how your boyfriend feels or acts?
- Are you feeling pressured into having sex?
- What if you break up soon after having sex?
- Do you know how to protect yourself from pregnancy and STDs?
- Do you have access to condoms? Are you comfortable using them with your partner?
- Do you know how to get tested for STDs and will you do that?
- Are you comfortable telling your boyfriend what feels good and what doesn’t?
- If something goes wrong or you have an emergency, do you have an adult who you can talk to?
Thinking about these questions will help you decide if sex is something you actually want to get into right now. Good luck!